No, I'm not staging a new (Christian?) version of "Fiddler on the Roof." But as we are up to our necks in holiday muck, I find myself reflecting on the many traditions that make the season special for me and my family. Really, traditions are all the separate the holidays from "regular" time. Here are a few old (and new) traditions that I look forward to... (remembering that, for me, "the holidays" run from Thanksgiving until New Year's Day.)
1. Thanksgiving dinner
2. Wrapping Christmas presents
3. Cookie swap (that's a new one - but one that will hopefully be repeated)
4. Stuffing Elizabeth's stocking
5. Putting up a tree on Christmas Eve
6. Christmas morning breakfast and "Wizard of Oz" viewing with my dear husband and kin
7. Christmas dinner
8. Wingo Bingo on New Year's Eve Eve (not a typo - that's two "eves" on purpose)
9. New Year's Eve movie marathon
10. New Year's Eve lobster and/or decadent delights meal
Hey, presents for me didn't even make the list - not that I don't like getting stuff, but really, as I try to tell my mother-in-law when she starts to stress about making everything perfect for Christmas, people don't remember the stuff - the decorations, the gifts - nearly as well as they remember the time, the people, the places where they gathered and made holiday memories. I hope that as Elizabeth grows older, Santa will visit her and give her presents, but more than that, I hope that Sam and I can instill in her a sense that the holidays are special for much more than that.
And may I wish everyone out there in Internet land a happy holiday season - whatever your traditions!
Monday, December 22, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Look! Poetry
Since I have no fine motor skills to speak of, I decided that I would give writing a(nother) try. However, fiction and prose tend to overwhelm me unless I have a specific topic. Thus, I am taking my own advice, doled out while I taught my lovely 7th graders, and am trying poetry. Short, accessible with many forms, and infinitely variable, poetry may be the creative outlet I need.
My first attempts, I have decided, will be in using traditional forms - free verse is way too wide open for someone as OC as me. I'm beginning with the triolet, a French form from the late Middle Ages. Only eight lines long, with two lines repeated throughout, the triolet is a cousin to the round (think "Row, Row, Row Your Boat") and has a satisfying circuity of sound and thought.
As I have been feeling a bit off lately (for lack of a better term - I tried googling "how to tell if you're depressed" today; good news is I'm probably not, bad news is that means I'm just cranky), my first triolet is a bit self-indulgent:
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
I wish I knew why.
I feel angry, sad, petty and small.
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
And yet, through it all...
While I fume and mope and cry
I wish I knew why
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
My second attempt is more inherently joyful (though perhaps with a touch of melancholy) as the subject is Elizabeth. Coincidentally (or perhaps I just have a small vocabulary) both poems use ball as one of the major rhymes.
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
And yesterday she began to run.
Didn't she just learn to crawl?
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
She's gone from small and soft to sturdy and tall.
Climbing, dancing, never done.
And yesterday she began to run.
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
Hmm... looks like I was right - poetry is fun!
My first attempts, I have decided, will be in using traditional forms - free verse is way too wide open for someone as OC as me. I'm beginning with the triolet, a French form from the late Middle Ages. Only eight lines long, with two lines repeated throughout, the triolet is a cousin to the round (think "Row, Row, Row Your Boat") and has a satisfying circuity of sound and thought.
As I have been feeling a bit off lately (for lack of a better term - I tried googling "how to tell if you're depressed" today; good news is I'm probably not, bad news is that means I'm just cranky), my first triolet is a bit self-indulgent:
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
I wish I knew why.
I feel angry, sad, petty and small.
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
And yet, through it all...
While I fume and mope and cry
I wish I knew why
Sometimes I want to curl up in a ball.
My second attempt is more inherently joyful (though perhaps with a touch of melancholy) as the subject is Elizabeth. Coincidentally (or perhaps I just have a small vocabulary) both poems use ball as one of the major rhymes.
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
And yesterday she began to run.
Didn't she just learn to crawl?
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
She's gone from small and soft to sturdy and tall.
Climbing, dancing, never done.
And yesterday she began to run.
My daughter's favorite word is ball.
Hmm... looks like I was right - poetry is fun!
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Soup's On
As autumn kicks into full gear and an annoying cold has settled into my system, it seems like the perfect time to break out soup. It's warm and soothing, plus I can make it in my slow cooker (the most awesome home appliance anywhere).
I'm making veggie soup for dinner tonight and am planning on potato soup for Sunday. Tuesday night we had tomato soup and I include the recipe here (partially for any random readers and mostly for myself so that I don't forget what I did!):
Coarsely chop 4-5 fresh tomatoes - place in the bottom of slow cooker.
Add: 1 beef bouillon cube, 1 chopped onion, 1/2 cup water, 1 eight oz. can of tomato sauce and spices to taste (I used black pepper, oregano, fresh basil and thyme).
Cook on low for 5-6 hours.
Add 1/2 cup milk - cook an additional 30 minutes.
Yummy served with fresh warm bread or biscuits for dunking!
I'm making veggie soup for dinner tonight and am planning on potato soup for Sunday. Tuesday night we had tomato soup and I include the recipe here (partially for any random readers and mostly for myself so that I don't forget what I did!):
Coarsely chop 4-5 fresh tomatoes - place in the bottom of slow cooker.
Add: 1 beef bouillon cube, 1 chopped onion, 1/2 cup water, 1 eight oz. can of tomato sauce and spices to taste (I used black pepper, oregano, fresh basil and thyme).
Cook on low for 5-6 hours.
Add 1/2 cup milk - cook an additional 30 minutes.
Yummy served with fresh warm bread or biscuits for dunking!
Monday, September 22, 2008
I'm an Idiot
Well, my husband says I'm not, so maybe I'll believe him. Anyway, I lost my engagement ring. Hence the fact that I am an idiot. I know it was an accident, but it is still gnawing at me like crazy. I keep hoping someone will call and say "I found it!" but each hour that passes diminishes that hope. And I know... "the best things in life aren't things." But this is an irreplaceable thing. My grandfather gave this ring to my grandmother who shared it with me and Sam. It's a symbol of our promise to each other... and I know I still have my wedding band. But still. Driving me nuts!!!
Also, and this is totally a vanity point, I liked having all the shine going on at my ring finger. Technically, the really important symbol (wedding band) is still there. But the glitz is gone. So it's an emotional wrench coupled with a (less but still present) desire to have my ring back to show off.
I still have my husband, my baby, my home, my grandma, my parents and siblings and all the other blessings life has brought me. I just wish I still had that shiny little piece of metal around my finger too.
Also, and this is totally a vanity point, I liked having all the shine going on at my ring finger. Technically, the really important symbol (wedding band) is still there. But the glitz is gone. So it's an emotional wrench coupled with a (less but still present) desire to have my ring back to show off.
I still have my husband, my baby, my home, my grandma, my parents and siblings and all the other blessings life has brought me. I just wish I still had that shiny little piece of metal around my finger too.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
New areas of expertise
Before you have a baby, people (all kinds of people!) find it necessary to tell you helpful things like "this will totally change your life" and "you have no idea what this will really be like" and "it's such a magical experience." I don't know about any magic, but I do know that having a kid changes you in many ways... let's focus on one today, shall we? I'll call it "new areas of expertise."
As a non-parenting child-free adult, you certainly have areas of expertise. They may be related to your job, your hobbies, what have you. As a parent, you somehow become immediately fluent on all kinds of unlikely topics. Here's a sampler:
1. Baby poop
2. The breast vs. bottle debate
3. The "cry it out" question
4. Solid food time lines and recipes
5. Vaccines and their link to autism
6. Baby sign language
7. Teething
8. Crawling and cruising
9. The best brands of teething biscuits
10. "Green" baby options
And on and on...
And lots more... I reflect on this right now because I just got back from the park. Elizabeth and I were walking with two other mom-baby pairs. And as I think back over our conversation (the moms', not the babies'), I realize that all three of us had taken on the air of "one who knows." There was quoting of experts, mentions of books we'd read and websites we'd used, an extensive dissection of the various pediatricians at our group practice and how we found them in relation to several of the topics listed above. It's bizarre. And sometimes stifling, because I fear that I might be running out of "non baby" things to discuss with others.
No matter. I need to go check in on my favorite baby food website and see where I'm going next with my daughter's food plan. Rock on weaning.
As a non-parenting child-free adult, you certainly have areas of expertise. They may be related to your job, your hobbies, what have you. As a parent, you somehow become immediately fluent on all kinds of unlikely topics. Here's a sampler:
1. Baby poop
2. The breast vs. bottle debate
3. The "cry it out" question
4. Solid food time lines and recipes
5. Vaccines and their link to autism
6. Baby sign language
7. Teething
8. Crawling and cruising
9. The best brands of teething biscuits
10. "Green" baby options
And on and on...
And lots more... I reflect on this right now because I just got back from the park. Elizabeth and I were walking with two other mom-baby pairs. And as I think back over our conversation (the moms', not the babies'), I realize that all three of us had taken on the air of "one who knows." There was quoting of experts, mentions of books we'd read and websites we'd used, an extensive dissection of the various pediatricians at our group practice and how we found them in relation to several of the topics listed above. It's bizarre. And sometimes stifling, because I fear that I might be running out of "non baby" things to discuss with others.
No matter. I need to go check in on my favorite baby food website and see where I'm going next with my daughter's food plan. Rock on weaning.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Blast from the Past
I just read the one and only post I've previously made to this blog and it was like visiting an old friend or, perhaps more accurately, a crazy long-lost relative. That sad voice is ME. Reading that post, I remember how it felt "back in the day" (not even a year ago!) when la bebe was just a few weeks old. Since that posting, life, the babe, and I have all changed - and I'm going to go out on a limb here - for the better.
True to what I said, I did find some mom groups online and they were a spring board to finding other, more local playgroups. In those early months, "playgroup" meant "sanity" for me. Getting out of the house, having a destination where I knew I would find other women going through the same emotional roller coaster was huge. And then, that step out of the house led to other changes.
Elizabeth began to sleep through the night. Her feedings became more spaced out and now include consumables other than breast milk. I took on some part-time work. I learned how to bake bread. My mother-in-law moved back to PA. I started bowling again. Life has taken on a routine that is fluid, but predictable. I curl up with my husband in bed at night and feel grateful for this time with my family, knowing this past year has been the most difficult of my life but also the most rewarding.
I kind of hope that no one I know would ever read this blog. I kind of hope that everyone I know would read this blog. I find it difficult to articulate how much has happened since that November day when I sat on this same chair, typing on this same computer. Being a mother, having a baby, it changes you - DUH. But like any pain, your mind dulls the memory of it, so that you can keep going on, maybe even try again the thing that has hurt you. Hearing that little voice from my past, my voice, I want so much to tell myself - hey, you'll get through it. Here I am! Just fine (neurotic as ever, maybe more so, but fine) and proud of all that this year has wrought.
Just a brief summary of how this year has been so pivotal in the way Sam and I live our life - Elizabeth arrives and I stop working full time. We have less money as a family than we ever have. Sam begins to explore "green" options for our home. I begin to explore "frugal" options as part of my stay at home duties. We notice that green and frugal converge in many ways. Furthermore, we see that green and frugal also jive with the way we want to raise our child(ren). Then Obama arrives on the scene and shakes everything up like mad.
2008 has been a wild year for our family.
But I believe that history will look back and see it as a wild, pivotal, important moment for our country and planet as well.
Whew - from my personal journey to a statement about our global heritage. Take that, six degrees of Kevin Bacon!
True to what I said, I did find some mom groups online and they were a spring board to finding other, more local playgroups. In those early months, "playgroup" meant "sanity" for me. Getting out of the house, having a destination where I knew I would find other women going through the same emotional roller coaster was huge. And then, that step out of the house led to other changes.
Elizabeth began to sleep through the night. Her feedings became more spaced out and now include consumables other than breast milk. I took on some part-time work. I learned how to bake bread. My mother-in-law moved back to PA. I started bowling again. Life has taken on a routine that is fluid, but predictable. I curl up with my husband in bed at night and feel grateful for this time with my family, knowing this past year has been the most difficult of my life but also the most rewarding.
I kind of hope that no one I know would ever read this blog. I kind of hope that everyone I know would read this blog. I find it difficult to articulate how much has happened since that November day when I sat on this same chair, typing on this same computer. Being a mother, having a baby, it changes you - DUH. But like any pain, your mind dulls the memory of it, so that you can keep going on, maybe even try again the thing that has hurt you. Hearing that little voice from my past, my voice, I want so much to tell myself - hey, you'll get through it. Here I am! Just fine (neurotic as ever, maybe more so, but fine) and proud of all that this year has wrought.
Just a brief summary of how this year has been so pivotal in the way Sam and I live our life - Elizabeth arrives and I stop working full time. We have less money as a family than we ever have. Sam begins to explore "green" options for our home. I begin to explore "frugal" options as part of my stay at home duties. We notice that green and frugal converge in many ways. Furthermore, we see that green and frugal also jive with the way we want to raise our child(ren). Then Obama arrives on the scene and shakes everything up like mad.
2008 has been a wild year for our family.
But I believe that history will look back and see it as a wild, pivotal, important moment for our country and planet as well.
Whew - from my personal journey to a statement about our global heritage. Take that, six degrees of Kevin Bacon!
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